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Post by Legend Lover on Nov 18, 2020 15:10:40 GMT -5
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Post by username on Nov 18, 2020 15:25:56 GMT -5
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Post by Gypo on Nov 18, 2020 15:29:02 GMT -5
Two old guys sitting on a bench one is telling the other how his back hurts and his hearing is bad and his knees are shot. He turns to the other old guy and asks him how do you feel. The guy responds like a new born baby. Ain't got no hair ain't got no teeth and I think I just wet myself
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Post by taiguy66 on Nov 18, 2020 16:55:46 GMT -5
Two old guys sitting on a bench one is telling the other how his back hurts and his hearing is bad and his knees are shot. He turns to the other old guy and asks him how do you feel. The guy responds like a new born baby. Ain't got no hair ain't got no teeth and I think I just wet myself LOL... STOP IT! Think I’m going to pee my pants!🤣👊 |
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Post by isett2860 on Nov 18, 2020 18:14:11 GMT -5
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Post by Legend Lover on Nov 18, 2020 18:26:59 GMT -5
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Post by Gandalf on Nov 18, 2020 18:37:12 GMT -5
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Post by Gandalf on Nov 18, 2020 18:37:36 GMT -5
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Post by mrlunting on Nov 18, 2020 18:48:30 GMT -5
I am very sorry to everyone. This is still my favorite!!. Just so many levels. Although. Those 'Gator Jokes '. |
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Post by isett2860 on Jan 4, 2021 8:28:15 GMT -5
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Post by bonanzadriver on Mar 3, 2021 15:57:21 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2021 15:53:46 GMT -5
This was sent to me by a friend: Subject: Observations from Day 56 I hope they give us two weeks notice before sending us back out into the real world. I think we'll all need the time to become ourselves again. And by "ourselves" I mean lose 10 pounds, cut our hair, and get used to not drinking at 9:00 a.m. Since you posted the above on May 18, I'll cut you some slack, but.....only 10 pounds?!?!? I got a letter the other day from my Doctor saying it's time for my annual physical. So a few days later they weighed me when I gave blood. I still haven't made the appointment for the physical as I couldn't bear the shame of going in at 30 pounds more than last year. |
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Post by Ronv69 on Mar 5, 2021 15:59:44 GMT -5
This was sent to me by a friend: Subject: Observations from Day 56 I hope they give us two weeks notice before sending us back out into the real world. I think we'll all need the time to become ourselves again. And by "ourselves" I mean lose 10 pounds, cut our hair, and get used to not drinking at 9:00 a.m. Since you posted the above on May 18, I'll cut you some slack, but.....only 10 pounds?!?!? I got a letter the other day from my Doctor saying it's time for my annual physical. So a few days later they weighed me when I gave blood. I still haven't made the appointment for the physical as I couldn't bear the shame of going in at 30 pounds more than last year. 6 months ago I was down to 220, now I'm up to 234. |
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Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2021 16:31:23 GMT -5
Since you posted the above on May 18, I'll cut you some slack, but.....only 10 pounds?!?!? I got a letter the other day from my Doctor saying it's time for my annual physical. So a few days later they weighed me when I gave blood. I still haven't made the appointment for the physical as I couldn't bear the shame of going in at 30 pounds more than last year. 6 months ago I was down to 220, now I'm up to 234. I can now balance a beer can on my belly while watching t.v., so it's not all bad. |
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Post by isett2860 on Mar 5, 2021 17:22:34 GMT -5
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Post by isett2860 on Apr 13, 2021 13:15:42 GMT -5
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Post by Professor S. on Apr 15, 2021 18:33:29 GMT -5
In commemoration of the 109th anniversary...  |
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Post by Professor S. on Apr 15, 2021 18:36:40 GMT -5
That reminded me of this one...  |
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Post by toshtego on Apr 15, 2021 19:19:06 GMT -5
Her Majesty, The Queen, frequently inspects the Guards protecting Buckingham Palace. On this occasion, it is the Irish Guards. Her Majesty enjoys stopping and speaking to the occasional Guardsman. HM, "You know, young man, I have a nephew in the Irish Guards." Trooper, "It is a small world, Your Majesty, I have an uncle who is a Queen!"  |
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Post by sperrytops on Apr 15, 2021 20:51:04 GMT -5
Her Majesty, The Queen, frequently inspects the Guards protecting Buckingham Palace. On this occasion, it is the Irish Guards. Her Majesty enjoys stopping and speaking to the occasional Guardsman. HM, "You know, young man, I have a nephew in the Irish Guards." Trooper, "It is a small world, Your Majesty, I have an uncle who is a Queen!" Somehow this one really got me laughing. |
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Post by toshtego on Apr 17, 2021 9:43:06 GMT -5
Told to me by an Irish actor in Hollywood who will remain unnamed. It is an old joke over there.
Also, for us gun nutz. Notice the Guards are armed with the FN FAL rifle. The last decent gun in British service. Now they have some kind of little toy pop gun which looks silly in the occasions.
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Post by toshtego on May 26, 2021 9:59:11 GMT -5
"I do not smoke a Pipe often. When I do, it is Balkan Sobranie."  |
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Post by Silver on May 26, 2021 20:38:42 GMT -5
Not C & D Bow-legged Bear?
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