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Post by trailboss on Nov 4, 2018 21:34:41 GMT -5
Maybe you have been there, maybe you have not...
You enter a store with clear manual double doors, where the guy leaving the store has the ability to open his door and let himself out...but he gets to the door ahead of you, waits for you to open the door and let him out so you can act on an act of of chivalry on you part. I get it if his arms are full and the doors only open inward, but that is never the case....I typically walk in and ask the guy holding the single cup as he looks at me quizically.. "Is your door broken?" Of course an aged individual, obviously handicapped...different story...I am talking about guys that are in their prime.
Man up!...Of course these guys look at me like I am an A-hole, but from what I see i really don't care about their stamp of approval.
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Post by kxg on Nov 4, 2018 21:45:04 GMT -5
Ahhh Charlie...take the high road and exhibit a measure of grace in the face of a##hattery. It is better for your peace of mind and blood pressure in the long run.
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Post by trailboss on Nov 4, 2018 21:48:08 GMT -5
Ahhh Charlie...take the high road and exhibit a measure of grace in the face of a##hattery. It is better for your peace of mind and blood pressure in the long run. It doesn't raise my blood pressure...probably theirs though...just sharing my thoughts among friends. I will hold a door for a woman every time...able bodied man with free hands and no obvious disability...no. |
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Post by mwps70 on Nov 4, 2018 21:50:04 GMT -5
It's easier to be an asshole than it is to suck it up and do the good thing...grrr...I keep trying lol.
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Post by pepesdad1 on Nov 4, 2018 21:51:59 GMT -5
Personally, I just go in through the door...not really minding what the other person may be doing...if they aren't crippled in some way, then it is up to them get get their sorry butts out/in the door. If it is a lady then I will do what I always do, open the door for them.
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Post by trailboss on Nov 4, 2018 21:54:41 GMT -5
It's easier to be an asshole than it is to suck it up and do the good thing...grrr...I keep trying lol. I don't think it is being an asshole to another guy though...maybe I am a dinosaur, but how hard is it to open your own door instead of waiting for another man to do so for you? I think that the weasel in waiting is the asshole. |
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Post by mwps70 on Nov 4, 2018 21:55:53 GMT -5
I will say that I do hold the door open for anyone behind me. Could make someone think a positive thought about humanity for a second...maybe. But I agree, if it is plain laziness or expectation, that is irritating.
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Post by trailboss on Nov 4, 2018 22:00:19 GMT -5
Point taken...so do I.
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Post by mwps70 on Nov 4, 2018 22:00:23 GMT -5
It's easier to be an asshole than it is to suck it up and do the good thing...grrr...I keep trying lol. I don't think it is being an asshole to another guy though...maybe i am a dinosaur, but how hard is it to open your own door instead of waiting for another man to do so for you? I think that the weasel in waiting is the asshole. Oh I totally agree, was just trying to be funny. I am always a gentleman but when it is abused then that ticks me off. Driving down the interstate to and from work is another place where I really have a problem with lack of repect. Everyone has to get to a point b from a point a and no one traveler is more important than another. It is generally a lack of respect for another. IMO |
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Post by Deleted on Nov 4, 2018 22:03:01 GMT -5
Ahhh Charlie...take the high road and exhibit a measure of grace in the face of a##hattery. It is better for your peace of mind and blood pressure in the long run. It doesn't raise my blood pressure...probably theirs though...just sharing my thoughts among friends. I will hold a door for a woman every time...able bodied man with free hands and no obvious disability...no. Charlie, most likely Mr. Arsehole only uses the door on the left. And is OCD about touching doors with bare hands. But yet he will pick up his taco from the floor and eat it. Oh yea, he has to have his daily 30pk and 750ml of Vodka. Then he goes to play Pickle Ball. |
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driftingfate
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Post by driftingfate on Nov 4, 2018 22:03:50 GMT -5
I hold the entry doors for women and men at work, ok - mostly women, but if a guy is walking with them, I don't let go - and I've universally experienced positive responses from the ladies, shocked looks from the men.
This is quite opposite of what I received in college many, many moons ago when all I heard was, "You know, I can open the door for myself" and looks of superiority, especially from the frat dudes.
Age changes people, but I try to be polite as I can be.
If an able bodied male was EXPECTING me to hold the door, I think I would just stand on the other side and look at him with a bemused look. Thankfully, I don't go out a lot and haven't experienced what you have, Charlie. Men open doors for themselves and on the rare occasion someone holds it for them, be profusely thankful.
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Post by blackmouth210 on Nov 4, 2018 22:04:40 GMT -5
I keep the sticks in my craw to an absolute minimum. The situation described above doesn't even come close to earning any sticks for my craw.
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Post by pepesdad1 on Nov 4, 2018 22:08:35 GMT -5
^^^Pretty much.
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Post by kxg on Nov 4, 2018 22:09:16 GMT -5
The way I view the world is this: in situations as you describe, the personal cost is minimal and taking the high road creates a bright spot in the world. Whether the other person appreciates it or even notices is not the point; you leave that moment a bit better than you found it. That can only be good.
But, I don’t like rudeness any more than the next person.
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Post by oldcajun123 on Nov 4, 2018 22:09:47 GMT -5
 I understand, I opened the door for a woman Engineer at Exxon, was told I"ll open my own door, slammed it in her face and said you're God Damn right you will.
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Post by mwps70 on Nov 4, 2018 22:15:54 GMT -5
The way I view the world is this: in situations as you describe, the personal cost is minimal and taking the high road creates a bright spot in the world. Whether the other person appreciates it or even notices is not the point; you leave that moment a bit better than you found it. That can only be good. But, I don’t like rudeness any more than the next person. Yup! That.  |
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Post by trailboss on Nov 4, 2018 22:17:34 GMT -5
Well the stick in my craw might have been a stronger term than I meant...but I have never waited for another man to open the door for me when I get to the door ahead of him or even at the same time in the described situation in the OP...but if others want to "take the high road" who am I to say....  I won't be waiting for another guy, but I will wait on a lady... |
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Post by Cramptholomew on Nov 4, 2018 23:27:35 GMT -5
Just for kudos, I always open my own door. The funny thing is, people on the other side of the other door always seem surprised when they open their door to let me out, even though I'm walking out the other one.
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Post by trailboss on Nov 4, 2018 23:35:56 GMT -5
Just for kudos, I always open my own door. The funny thing is, people on the other side of the other door always seem surprised when they open their door to let me out, even though I'm walking out the other one. Not to minimize what you say...in the same situation, I will be gentlemanly and open the door for them and thank those that take the initiative in the situation you describe. To reiterate...in my Op, I am talking about guys that see me coming through clear doors, holding a mega gulp in one hand waiting for me to get to the door so I can open it for them, and give pissy looks when I don't help aiding in their feminization...that is the context in which I speak. |
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desolbones
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Post by desolbones on Nov 4, 2018 23:39:23 GMT -5
I hold the door for anyone following me, when exiting will hold the door for someone coming up to enter. If caught in the OP situation I'd be powerfully tempted to drop a line similar to " With your obvious disability how could I not" Let him make what he will of it.
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Post by Cramptholomew on Nov 5, 2018 0:02:43 GMT -5
Just for kudos, I always open my own door. The funny thing is, people on the other side of the other door always seem surprised when they open their door to let me out, even though I'm walking out the other one. Not to minimize what you say...in the same situation, I will be gentlemanly and open the door for them and thank those that take the initiative in the situation you describe. To reiterate...in my Op, I am talking about guys that see me coming through clear doors, holding a mega gulp in one hand waiting for me to get to the door so I can open it for them, and give pissy looks when I don't help aiding in their feminization...that is the context in which I speak. I get it. I do exactly the same as you, and I'm genuinely courteous. I just glommed on to your statement about there being two doors, and people not using "their" door, while expecting you to open which ever one they're standing behind. |
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chasingembers
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Post by chasingembers on Nov 5, 2018 2:11:55 GMT -5
At nearly 50 years old and a very tiny frame due to an extremely over active thyroid, I open the door just wide enough for me to get through all lizard style and let the door shut on Mr. Lazy. Been there many times.😈 If the person genuinely needs help, I'm first to assist, just can't tolerate lazy. Got whacked in the head by my elders decades ago for the same thing.
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Post by Legend Lover on Nov 5, 2018 7:58:39 GMT -5
I've never heard of stick in my craw. I get what it means, I think. As for the question at hand. I understand your frustration, trailboss . I just wonder if many other people even think about what they are doing or the implications these days. Edit: I looked up the phrase - I never knew 'craw' was a synonym for 'throat'. Every day is a school-day. |
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Post by Deleted on Nov 5, 2018 8:07:18 GMT -5
I’m curteous to “ those “ who are disable or in need of a hand. I always open or hold the door for a lady, that’s how I was taught. But many times, even those days when I walk with a cane I find many people today can give a “ hoot “ about others. I have a habit whenever I walk into any store I look behind me to check if anyone is behind me, I’ve often waited a few seconds just to hold the door open.....that’s just me.
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Post by toshtego on Nov 5, 2018 10:17:02 GMT -5
I have not noticed door problems here. Many people hold open doors for me and I do the same for others.
My beef is with the people who barge into elevators before the people already inside can exit. That would be more room in there if you let the people out. Never understood the thinking.
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Post by Legend Lover on Nov 5, 2018 12:57:44 GMT -5
I have not noticed door problems here. Many people hold open doors for me and I do the same for others.
My beef is with the people who barge into elevators before the people already inside can exit. That would be more room in there if you let the people out. Never understood the thinking.
oh that grates on me too. 😡 |
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Post by mwps70 on Nov 5, 2018 13:15:00 GMT -5
I’m curteous to “ those “ who are disable or in need of a hand. I always open or hold the door for a lady, that’s how I was taught. But many times, even those days when I walk with a cane I find many people today can give a “ hoot “ about others. I have a habit whenever I walk into any store I look behind me to check if anyone is behind me, I’ve often waited a few seconds just to hold the door open.....that’s just me. Me to.  |
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Post by pepesdad1 on Nov 5, 2018 13:30:13 GMT -5
I’m curteous to “ those “ who are disable or in need of a hand. I always open or hold the door for a lady, that’s how I was taught. But many times, even those days when I walk with a cane I find many people today can give a “ hoot “ about others. I have a habit whenever I walk into any store I look behind me to check if anyone is behind me, I’ve often waited a few seconds just to hold the door open.....that’s just me. Me to. Yup, brother of a different mother and all that...How ever vvvvvv |
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Post by pepesdad1 on Nov 5, 2018 13:30:42 GMT -5
I understand, I opened the door for a woman Engineer at Exxon, was told I"ll open my own door, slammed it in her face and said you're God Damn right you will. This, too^^^^^^^ |
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Post by trailboss on Nov 5, 2018 18:07:05 GMT -5
I've never heard of stick in my craw. I get what it means, I think. As for the question at hand. I understand your frustration, trailboss . I just wonder if many other people even think about what they are doing or the implications these days. Edit: I looked up the phrase - I never knew 'craw' was a synonym for 'throat'. Every day is a school-day. Yeah... a pebble in the shoe would have been a more accurate description... bearable, but irritating. |
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I understand, I opened the door for a woman Engineer at Exxon, was told I"ll open my own door, slammed it in her face and said you're God Damn right you will.
