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Post by unknownpipesmoker on Feb 4, 2019 13:58:14 GMT -5
I flew to Thailand a couple of weeks ago.
I knew my rheumatism was in its final, more severe stages. I knew my heart was weak, both literally and figuratively. I knew I had two holes in my gut that needed to be plugged. I knew that I probably had two to five years left, if I was lucky. 70 years old. That's ten past sixty. Twenty past 50. Twenty years more than I ever wanted, or needed, honestly.
I knew that I had just been divorced. I knew that I had been doing too much running around the Northeast in the cold. Chasing stories, incense, potpourri, tobacco, mystics with quirky smiles, and long-legged, wicked creatures of various varieties.
But I also knew that I was here last year, and aside from a certain evil wench, the trip was okay. I enjoyed it, to a certain extent. I always feel like my experiences in Siam are mixed. It's never totally good, but not totally bad either. It's one of those "meals" that you have in life that are okay, but satisfying.
All this running around. I can't take it much longer. My arrthmyia is all over the place. It sounds like a cricket banging around, trying to escape from an empty soup can. Just awful. I added a new medical condition to my tally, also. Rectal prolapse. My arse is literally falling out of my trousers. Isn't ageing fun? Drugs are illegal here. Totally. All of them. The good ones, anyway. And I cannot drink alcohol anymore on the count of a totally wrecked kidneys and urinary system. I think I am more lucid when I am on drugs, than when I am off of them. The murky, disheveled, unsanitary conditions of reality are like a cold fish slapping against the wrinkled skin on my face.
I did meet a pretty woman here. I thought at first she might be like all of the others. But she proved me wrong. I feel connected to her, on a spiritual level. It's like nothing I've ever felt before. I even asked her to marry me. She said yes. As I sit here, though, staring into the cold, empty space of this frigid, air conditioned hotel room situated in the heart of Bangkok, sipping on some delicious Maalox, typing all of this into my phone, I know there's two stories to be told.
My health did not leave me in America. No, that beast of burden came with me to Thailand, obviously. In the worst way humanly possible. I need to leave early. I had to pay a tonne to re-arrange my flight home to a week prior to my original departure. The reason? Two emergency surgeries as soon as I depart from my domestic airport. That's right. Sometimes I think I'm ready for some death. The ultimate trip. My ascent into that noble city in the sky. To sit in that royal throne hall, together with the Son of Man. Let it happen. It's going to feel so good.
Maybe I have another 15 or 20 years under my belt. I just feel held together by thread and scraps of tin metal. So I doubt that. Maybe that's okay.
Do you ever feel like the heavy hand of God reached down through the heavens just to smash your sorry face into the concrete? I have. But maybe our good Lord is simply trying to tell me: you're an old fucker now. Slow down. Relax. This won't hurt.
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Post by pepesdad1 on Feb 4, 2019 14:17:31 GMT -5
pm sent.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 4, 2019 15:03:09 GMT -5
Your moving way to fast, slow down. You might feel better. Oh, don’t ever get married again!!!!!! Take better care of yourself, be well and enjoy life longer.....but single 👍 I wish you all the best with your journey back to the States. You will receive much better medical care here at home.
Tonight at 9:00pm I will light a candle, you will be in my Prayers
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briarbuck
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Post by briarbuck on Feb 4, 2019 15:15:35 GMT -5
A tough spot. Positive vibrations coming your way sir. One day at a time.
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Post by sperrytops on Feb 4, 2019 15:20:19 GMT -5
Prayers in your direction. Hope the upcoming medical procedures go well and you live another 20.
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Post by Cramptholomew on Feb 4, 2019 15:33:05 GMT -5
Be strong, buddy. Once you're over the hurdles, things will brighten up. Take it easy, and don't be so hard on yourself. Also, if you're 70, and into Tame Impala, you're clearly not done. Prayers your way.
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Post by unknownpipesmoker on Feb 4, 2019 15:49:33 GMT -5
Be strong, buddy. Once you're over the hurdles, things will brighten up. Take it easy, and don't be so hard on yourself. Also, if you're 70, and into Tame Impala, you're clearly not done. Prayers your way. Thanks! I was listening to some Shuggie Otis and Baby Huey earlier. But I really like what bands like Brian Jonestown Massacre, Tame Impala, and Khruangbin are doing today. Putting out some sounds and melodies the likes of which I haven't heard in years. I love folk but I also love funk and dream pop. I try to keep it kind of fresh! |
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Post by Cramptholomew on Feb 4, 2019 15:52:08 GMT -5
Be strong, buddy. Once you're over the hurdles, things will brighten up. Take it easy, and don't be so hard on yourself. Also, if you're 70, and into Tame Impala, you're clearly not done. Prayers your way. Thanks! I was listening to some Shuggie Otis and Baby Huey earlier. But I really like what bands like Brian Jonestown Massacre, Tame Impala, and Khruangbin are doing today. Putting out some sounds and melodies the likes of which I haven't heard in years. I love folk but I also love funk and dream pop. I try to keep it kind of fresh! The early Tame Impala stuff is really psychedelic. Lots of 60s sound design. |
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Post by Legend Lover on Feb 4, 2019 18:29:28 GMT -5
Thinking of you, buddy. There's not much else to say. I hope you can pull through this and come out the other end stronger.
We've all got your back!
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jackdiamond
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Post by jackdiamond on Feb 4, 2019 20:18:13 GMT -5
Cheers, UPS. You're in a tough spot, but Fortune can't own you if you don't let her.
Seneca said, "Let me be harassed by toil and sorrow and strife, that so I may acquire true strength." He went on to say that he pities men who've never gone through a hard time because they would never know what they were capable of. Fortume has dealt you a rough hand, but you're still standing. That's something to be proud of.
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Post by AJ on Feb 4, 2019 22:59:50 GMT -5
I think if I were in your shoes I would read John 3:16 then have a long talk with the Lord and ask Him to show you what He wants you to do with the rest of your life.
AJ
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Post by kxg on Feb 5, 2019 0:31:56 GMT -5
If I may be so bold as to call you friend; Peace be with you my friend.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 5, 2019 0:49:52 GMT -5
You're good writer with an interesting, thoughtful take on life. I thought you were far younger than 70 - partly because of your taste in music, but mostly because of your attitude towards life. It will stand you in good stead through all the changes you described, both positive and negative. I wish you all the best, sir.
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Post by unknownpipesmoker on Feb 5, 2019 1:16:30 GMT -5
You're good writer with an interesting, thoughtful take on life. I thought you were far younger than 70 - partly because of your taste in music, but mostly because of your attitude towards life. It will stand you in good stead through all the changes you described, both positive and negative. I wish you all the best, sir. Thank you. I didn't always think this way. One day my best friend took me to a Grateful Dead concert and it kind of changed me forever. I was "turned on" to ideas and music there that finally made me feel not alone in the world anymore. Sadly, most of my friends have since kind of "sold out". Really, our rugged idealism just didn't work out as planned for most of us, as we entered our late twenties, and tried to raise families. However, most of them are kind folk, and are a little gentler to the planet. That's more than 98 percent or so of people do today. I've had more than my fair share of major surgeries, so I think I should take this in stride. I have a very high pain tolerance. A little transcendal meditation and prayer will help also. I appreciate all of the prayers and we'll wishes from everyone. I won't be smoking for awhile. I'll use this time to clean and polish up my cellar and pipes. If everything goes right, I'll be back this summer here in semi-retirement. Smoke 'em if you got 'em, lads. |
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Post by unknownpipesmoker on Feb 5, 2019 3:04:05 GMT -5
I think if I were in your shoes I would read John 3:16 then have a long talk with the Lord and ask Him to show you what He wants you to do with the rest of your life. AJ I actually prayed and meditated on this a LOT and God's answer was extremely simple: you need to go to church more often! When you cant make it, call the parish priest, and he will come to you. One hour out of the week. I've been too lazy this year. Turns out, Jesus is a pretty reasonable guy.  |
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Post by unknownpipesmoker on Feb 5, 2019 3:22:15 GMT -5
Your moving way to fast, slow down. You might feel better. Oh, don’t ever get married again!!!!!! Take better care of yourself, be well and enjoy life longer.....but single 👍 I wish you all the best with your journey back to the States. You will receive much better medical care here at home. Tonight at 9:00pm I will light a candle, you will be in my Prayers Well we have no set plans. This summer is being talked about. I'm eligible for the retirement visa here. The nursing homes in Chiang Mai are getting crazy expensive if you want western-style care. She's almost forty and she's a hard worker. Just an honest person. I have real feelings for her. I really need someone to love me, cook, clean, provide the comforts of home. I'm just not taking care of myself in these trailers and flop houses alone like I used to be able to. But if I live with her, we have to be married. I don't want to die living in sin with a safety pin!  . I love her. If she's sincere, well marry. I promised her that. |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 5, 2019 3:54:15 GMT -5
Your moving way to fast, slow down. You might feel better. Oh, don’t ever get married again!!!!!! Take better care of yourself, be well and enjoy life longer.....but single 👍 I wish you all the best with your journey back to the States. You will receive much better medical care here at home. Tonight at 9:00pm I will light a candle, you will be in my Prayers Well we have no set plans. This summer is being talked about. I'm eligible for the retirement visa here. The nursing homes in Chiang Mai are getting crazy expensive if you want western-style care. She's almost forty and she's a hard worker. Just an honest person. I have real feelings for her. I really need someone to love me, cook, clean, provide the comforts of home. I'm just not taking care of myself in these trailers and flop houses alone like I used to be able to. But if I live with her, we have to be married. I don't want to die living in sin with a safety pin! . I love her. If she's sincere, well marry. I promised her that. I wish you all the best, just make sure that she has no hidden agenda.......like becoming an American citizen and leaving you in the dust when you come back to the States. Hope you feel better physically, as well as mentally. Find what makes you feel happy in life, but travel the road carefully. You’ll be in my thoughts and Prayers |
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Post by unknownpipesmoker on Feb 5, 2019 4:01:24 GMT -5
Well we have no set plans. This summer is being talked about. I'm eligible for the retirement visa here. The nursing homes in Chiang Mai are getting crazy expensive if you want western-style care. She's almost forty and she's a hard worker. Just an honest person. I have real feelings for her. I really need someone to love me, cook, clean, provide the comforts of home. I'm just not taking care of myself in these trailers and flop houses alone like I used to be able to. But if I live with her, we have to be married. I don't want to die living in sin with a safety pin! . I love her. If she's sincere, well marry. I promised her that. I wish you all the best, just make sure that she has no hidden agenda.......like becoming an American citizen and leaving you in the dust when you come back to the States. Hope you feel better physically, as well as mentally. Find what makes you feel happy in life, but travel the road carefully. You’ll be in my thoughts and Prayers That's already happened to me before. Haha. So trust me, I know. We'd be staying here in Thailand. I have nothing to worry about there. If we visit the USA, she would be on a visitors visa, with no status whatsoever. I'm not in this business of taking women back to the states anymore. I did it once and learned the hard way. It's more affordable and comfortable for me to just retire here. Thank you, buddy. . You'll be in mine as well. |
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Post by unknownpipesmoker on Feb 5, 2019 6:22:58 GMT -5
By the way, Kxg, Pepesdad, LL, Ted, AJ, jack, Jason, Perry, briarbuck, as well as everyone else, you're all my friends.
This whole forum, for the most part, has been really good to me. I'm very grateful for the brotherhood and camaraderie here.
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flybypipe
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Post by flybypipe on Feb 5, 2019 7:07:36 GMT -5
I really enjoy your contribution to this forum, your take on topics is truly unique. I will be thinking of you and looking forward to your return this summer.
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briarbuck
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Post by briarbuck on Feb 5, 2019 9:21:27 GMT -5
There was nothing like shakin' your bones and the sweet sounds of Mr Jerrome Garcia. Those types of experiences changes ones perspectives. I am thankful I had the chance to see the boys (and DJG) in their heyday.
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Post by Legend Lover on Feb 5, 2019 9:59:15 GMT -5
By the way, Kxg, Pepesdad, LL, Ted, AJ, jack, Jason, Perry, briarbuck, as well as everyone else, you're all my friends. This whole forum, for the most part, has been really good to me. I'm very grateful for the brotherhood and camaraderie here. Right back at you, brother! |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 5, 2019 10:46:11 GMT -5
Keep us posted on your surgeries.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 5, 2019 13:45:51 GMT -5
Good luck and miracles. Most of the people I know with that many conditions are... well, me. I am 62 and was done in twenty years ago. What keeps me alive is lack of stress. I used to think a drink would take care of every issue. I still take a drink once in a while. Now I believe nothing takes care of an issue like a good nap. My heartbeat is way down. My RA causes a constant pain level of 7, I think. Yet no one can get me to do anything I am not up to doing.
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. I love her. If she's sincere, well marry. I promised her that.
