graybeard68
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First Name: Nick
Favorite Pipe: Mincer era Custom-Bilt
Favorite Tobacco: GL Pease Maltese Falcon
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Post by graybeard68 on Apr 12, 2019 21:06:54 GMT -5
A age old tradition started my pops when my 2 brothers and I were little snot-noses, he would say "I need someone pull my finger" and we would all race each other to get his finger first to pull it! LOL
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Post by trailboss on Apr 12, 2019 21:19:27 GMT -5
In my house my American Bulldog rules the roost in this regard.... never, I mean never give your dog smoked lamb lungs.... it is a 12 hour fumigation exercise that raises rancidity to a new level.
Great gag to give to someone else’s dog.
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desolbones
Junior Member
Posts: 410 
First Name: Greg
Favorite Pipe: Briar, Clay,Cob, Meer, Metal and Morta.
Favorite Tobacco: Searching
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Post by desolbones on Apr 12, 2019 21:48:31 GMT -5
On a crowded elevator, let one slide and lean over to the nearest lady and in a loud whisper say "don't say anything and they'll think I did it"
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 12, 2019 22:32:54 GMT -5
Many, many years ago on a train in DC a “ silent but deadly “ one escaped. I looked at the gentleman next to me, stood up and said.... “ that’s disgusting “ and walked away. Looking back now it gives me a good 😂 laugh 😂
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Post by just ol ed on Apr 12, 2019 22:59:02 GMT -5
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chasingembers
Senior Member
Posts: 1,912
First Name: Duane
Favorite Pipe: My Growing J. Everett Collection, Fifteen Day Bruce Weaver Set, Meerschaums, Oguz Simsek Skulls
Favorite Tobacco: Black Frigate,Solani Silver Flake, Yenidje Highlander, Angler's Dream, Watch City Slices, Salty Dogs, Mephisto, Ennerdale Flake, Rich Dark Honeydew, 1792 Flake
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Post by chasingembers on Apr 13, 2019 1:51:07 GMT -5
Yep, I'm going to hell. 😂😂😂😂 |
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Post by Legend Lover on Apr 13, 2019 5:57:55 GMT -5
On a crowded elevator, let one slide and lean over to the nearest lady and in a loud whisper say "don't say anything and they'll think I did it" Farting in an elevator is wrong on many levels. 😉 |
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Post by Darin on Apr 13, 2019 7:04:01 GMT -5
On a crowded elevator, let one slide and lean over to the nearest lady and in a loud whisper say "don't say anything and they'll think I did it" Farting in an elevator is wrong on many levels. 😉 Lol ... nice.  |
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Post by Low and Slow on Apr 13, 2019 7:37:00 GMT -5
In my house my American Bulldog rules the roost in this regard.... never, I mean never give your dog smoked lamb lungs.... it is a 12 hour fumigation exercise that raises rancidity to a new level. Great gag to give to someone else’s dog. My mom has a Boston terrier that can make some you can taste! She calls him the crop duster because he will be walking around and farting in small spurts. She doesn’t really help the situation by letting him eat human food at times. But what can I do. |
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 13, 2019 10:53:15 GMT -5
On a crowded elevator, let one slide and lean over to the nearest lady and in a loud whisper say "don't say anything and they'll think I did it" Farting in an elevator is wrong on many levels. 😉 But oh so right if it’s someone you really don’t care for👌 |
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Post by sperrytops on Apr 13, 2019 16:53:39 GMT -5
Now that is interesting. What does a gas bubble look like? It is something you don’t see, but when you experience it, you know it. Some years back, on a cold clammy night in Salinas, a refrigeration technician bled off ammonia used in the refrigeration into the atmosphere instead of draining it into a vessel. That gas bubble floated across the property and into the city transit shop... a bunch of mechanics never saw it, but they got the full effect. Gives Silent But Deadly a new meaning. |
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Post by trailboss on Apr 14, 2019 2:26:50 GMT -5
We have a driver named Mike that picked up freight daily in Casa Grande (Halfway to Tucson) from a company that makes sheet metal ductwork. It isn't unusual for dispatch to send another driver down to handle the overflow, in this case Sal was the unfortunate victim...er driver.
The next day the conversation went like this...
Mike: "What do you think about Jennie down there at the shipping office?"
Sal: "Man, she is a babe! But I couldn't believe that you pulled a silent but deadly fart like that in the office, it was like egg salad that a skunk vomited up!"
Mike: "Yeah, That was pretty nasty, so nasty even I didn't want to claim it....You remember that you headed back out of the office as I finished up talking to Jennie?"
Sal: "Yes, I was glad to get out of the gas chamber!"
Mike: "As soon as you stepped out, I asked Jennie "Do you believe the nerve of that guy cutting the cheese in here?" Jennie replied "That was pretty rancid, it smelled like he crapped his pants!
At this point Sal turned red, and said 'you are kidding me....right?"
Mike: "Sal, I have picked up freight from her every day for a year, and not once have I ever given reason to think of me being so low in character as to do something like that....You however, left quite an impression on Jennie."
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Post by trailboss on Apr 14, 2019 2:38:51 GMT -5
Another time...I was the victim.
I was helping a guy with a delivery on the 35th floor of a building in the SF financial district, and it was just a few minutes before 9AM we caught the elevator down....he cut loose a loud one, I held my breath as the elevator made a quick nonstop trip to the first floor. We dashed out as a crowd capacity herd rushed in...as the doors closed you could see noses doing the bunny twitch, and the looks on the faces that communicate what they are smelling.
I headed out the door to go to my truck and he later told me that the elevator stopped on practically every floor...talk about a crappy way to start your day.
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Post by oldcajun123 on Apr 14, 2019 11:04:55 GMT -5
 On our 10 yr class reunion, wife roped me into going with her to buy a formal dress for the dance. I had eaten hot tamales ind drank boucou beers the night before. Going from rack to rack my stomach was boiling, while wife was trying on a dress, I spotted an old Blue hair lady on the other side of rack, couldn’t hold it any longer I backed up to the dress rack, opened up dress in middle and let it rip. Turned around and saw the Old Lady almost drop to her knees, something evil came upon me, I said Damn Lady you did that? To this day I’m ashamed , but I survived.! 
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Post by qmechanics on Apr 14, 2019 16:06:22 GMT -5
My ole' grand-pappy used to say better to release the exhaust than intake..😁
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Apr 15, 2019 8:56:20 GMT -5
Beer and lime are an evil combo for me. I worked at one company that had several floors of a building. The festivities of the previous night had created what I call a neutron bomb. That is where the building is still standing but nothing is living. So I take the elevator up and the door opens and I see my buddy waiting to get on. He was heading to the lobby. Dropped a silent neutron bomb and walked off the elevator. He walks on and as the doors are closing I hear, "GEEZUS Kris . . . ". He got out at the lobby and everyone getting on thought it was him.
I also loved dropping these on escalators. People traveling up, not know the doom they are about to face, would hit it and looked like they walked into cob webs. Not proud of my young self but any chance for a chuckle is a plus.
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On our 10 yr class reunion, wife roped me into going with her to buy a formal dress for the dance. I had eaten hot tamales ind drank boucou beers the night before. Going from rack to rack my stomach was boiling, while wife was trying on a dress, I spotted an old Blue hair lady on the other side of rack, couldn’t hold it any longer I backed up to the dress rack, opened up dress in middle and let it rip. Turned around and saw the Old Lady almost drop to her knees, something evil came upon me, I said Damn Lady you did that? To this day I’m ashamed , but I survived.! 
