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Post by puffy on Jan 11, 2022 12:25:29 GMT -5
My wife died 8 months ago..I was in a state of depression for about 6 months.What got me through was my faith in a higher power..Music on You Tube,and an app called Tic Toc..When my wife was alive we lived in a good sized house..We always had people in the house.I thought they were friends.Now that I live alone most of the time in a much smaller house those friends never show up.I'm over most of the depression now,but I really miss my wife's company..Sometimes I feel lonely with on one to talk to...Tic Toc is an app on my phone.It's an endless supply of short videos.It's not for everyone.It contains religion,politics,and a lot of other things.
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Post by darktater on Jan 11, 2022 12:43:24 GMT -5
I'm glad to hear you are getting through the hard times. What part of NC? Maybe we can get together for a bowl sometime, I'm just outside Charlotte...
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Post by terrapinflyer on Jan 11, 2022 13:57:06 GMT -5
Grief is hard enough without finding that people you thought were friends aren't so much. I'm glad you can find some comfort in your faith, though.
I don't use the chat here, but some folks do and maybe they can chime in. It's someone to talk to, anyway.
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Post by toshtego on Jan 11, 2022 13:58:37 GMT -5
The loss of a loved one never really ends. Coping improves but there is no filling that empty place inside you for a long time.
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Post by urbino on Jan 12, 2022 2:25:46 GMT -5
Grief is hard enough without finding that people you thought were friends aren't so much. I'm glad you can find some comfort in your faith, though. I don't use the chat here, but some folks do and maybe they can chime in. It's someone to talk to, anyway. Didn't see this earlier. The last of us just left the chatroom for the night, but you'd be more than welcome, Larry. Things usually get going around 9:30 or 10:00 pm CST. Serious depression is isolating. First it makes you want to be isolated. Then after a while you don't have much choice; people don't find you much fun to be around. I've been through it, myself. You just have to focus on putting one foot in front of the other, and let the rest go. After a while, you look up and find you've arrived someplace a little brighter. Talking to a professional can really help, if you find the right one. |
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Post by Legend Lover on Jan 12, 2022 8:42:38 GMT -5
I'm sorry that you went through what you went through. Losing your wife is bad enough, but your friends deserting you isn't what you needed at all. I'm glad your faith and other things got you through these difficult times. All I really see with TikTok are those stupid dances that young people do.
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Post by trailboss on Jan 13, 2022 18:19:11 GMT -5
If you are still physically mobile, I would get out and circulate amongst others, maybe engage in a hobby...
Find a solid church, I am sure that in north Carolina there are plenty, and you can network with other people that have lost their mates, and it might turn out to be quite rewarding. Resist the temptation to become a recluse and allow depression to drop tap roots into your soul.
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rastewart
Junior Member
Posts: 360
First Name: Rich
Favorite Pipe: Freehands, bent bulldogs, and the incomparable Peterson 303
Favorite Tobacco: Mac Baren's Scottish Blend (Mixture), C&D Mountain Camp, C&D Bayou Morning
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Post by rastewart on Jan 13, 2022 19:14:59 GMT -5
You have my sympathy, Larry. I haven't used chat here either, but I think it would be worth looking into. For what it may be worth--and understanding that it might not help any--your friends may be not coming by because they don't feel they know what to say, not because they don't care.
I don't know what kind of community you live in, but if you're able to, I think it could be helpful to get out and involved with things a little. I second Trailboss's suggestion of finding a church. And maybe your local library has programs of interest, or at least going over there to check out books or DVDs or read the newspaper would give you a little friendly human contact. (I'm a librarian myself, so I'm always going to talk up libraries. But they do a lot of good, quite apart from my own personal interest.)
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Post by CrustyCat on Feb 8, 2022 2:39:25 GMT -5
My wife died 8 months ago..I was in a state of depression for about 6 months.What got me through was my faith in a higher power..Music on You Tube,and an app called Tic Toc..When my wife was alive we lived in a good sized house..We always had people in the house.I thought they were friends.Now that I live alone most of the time in a much smaller house those friends never show up.I'm over most of the depression now,but I really miss my wife's company..Sometimes I feel lonely with on one to talk to...Tic Toc is an app on my phone.It's an endless supply of short videos.It's not for everyone.It contains religion,politics,and a lot of other things. I just saw this. I’m sorry for your loss also. As you may or may not know I lost my wife to cancer in November. Finally getting over completing all the legal crap. Just a few more things to take care of. Trying to find myself a new hobby to keep myself busy. I think I’m gonna take up photography. |
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Post by urbino on Feb 8, 2022 2:54:00 GMT -5
That's awesome, Kevin. Photography can be very rewarding, and will definitely soak up time. Do you know what kind of photography you're interested in?
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mrtalkradio
New Member
Fixing the World One Broadcast at a Time
Posts: 38 
First Name: George
Favorite Pipe: All
Favorite Tobacco: Virgina
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Post by mrtalkradio on Feb 8, 2022 3:05:26 GMT -5
My condolences.
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Post by dervis on Feb 8, 2022 13:18:09 GMT -5
Very sorry for your loss. Which it is a loss of so much more than a spouse. It sounds like there are so many things she brought to your life that words are not good enough to describe. I think in turn the only result in such a loss is depression for a time. Tangible and intangible things are missing from your world now that cant be replaced.
There is no rule book on grieving, and no set time it lasts. Only that it is not supposed to last forever.
Unfilled time is going to be the enemy for while. A good church , a hobby, local free classes at library's are all great suggestions. Phone apps certainly have their place, but are more distraction sometimes than actual healing. I would not lean on it to much. I would give a friend this advice, so no reason I would not give to you.
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