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Post by Goldbrick on Sept 27, 2023 12:56:04 GMT -5
On the morning of September 6th, my wife sat me down here in the kitchen and told me that the spot on her right lung is cancer, and that her next P.E.T. scan would tell us how bad and if it was confined to the lung. Last week, before she left on a yearly, sisters trip to The Outer Banks, she took her older sister{ a retired R.N.} along to hear details from the doctor.
two small masses in the right upper lung, together they equal the size of an almond...and even tho their faces were drawn and their eyes red and weepy when they gave me that news, they say it's too soon to speak of cancer...I think they're making light of it, to keep me sane while I'm alone for 10 or 12 days.
Both my wife and her sister continue to smoke, and glare at me when I speak of their madness, and " what about all those pipes?" they say, and I reply that if they both embraced the pipe when I asked them to, years ago, they'd both be much better off...then I offered to pack up my pipes and quit, if she would quit...more glares.
I was asked to keep it all under wraps , but the rest of the sisters got the news on Sunday ,so I'm laying it out there for my friends here at the patch.
A team of four is working now to see how best to go from here. So I'm asking for prayers for the doctor's wisdom and for God's blessing.
I've long forgotten how to live without my wife.
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Post by coalsmoke on Sept 27, 2023 13:23:46 GMT -5
Herb, we are certainly with you, your wife, and your family right now. You are all in our thoughts and prayers, my friend. Perhaps you could stay with someone while your wife and sister are away just as a break from the pressure.
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Post by just ol ed on Sept 27, 2023 13:29:10 GMT -5
am agnostic but sending good thoughts to all concerned
Ed
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Post by Silver on Sept 27, 2023 13:40:20 GMT -5
Sharon and you are in my prayers, Herb.
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Post by don on Sept 27, 2023 14:28:25 GMT -5
Herb, you and your wife are in my prayers.
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Post by urbino on Sept 27, 2023 15:16:16 GMT -5
I'm glad you're able to reach out to your friends now. We're here when you need us.
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Post by Ronv69 on Sept 27, 2023 16:23:04 GMT -5
Yall are in my prayers. Both my BIL and MIL dragged themselves out of the hospital bed and out to the hospital courtyard to smoke until they got too week. It's an addiction and they have to want to get clean. No one can make them.
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Post by Goldbrick on Sept 27, 2023 16:47:35 GMT -5
Yall are in my prayers. Both my BIL and MIL dragged themselves out of the hospital bed and out to the hospital courtyard to smoke until they got too week. It's an addiction and they have to want to get clean. No one can make them. The one person who's thoughts, actions, and deeds of valor, are of any value to Sharon, is her sister...and she wares oxygen all day, except when smoking! |
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Post by instymp on Sept 27, 2023 17:09:25 GMT -5
Prayers for all.
Hate that you have to wait. Drives me nuts. Specially for a wifes.
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Post by Goldbrick on Sept 27, 2023 18:12:35 GMT -5
Thank you all for your kindness.
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Post by taiguy66 on Sept 27, 2023 19:47:13 GMT -5
Just heard the bad news Herb. Will be sure to keep you and your wife in my prayers.
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Post by mgtarheel on Sept 27, 2023 20:26:17 GMT -5
Sending prayers to you and your wife.
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Post by username on Sept 27, 2023 20:46:07 GMT -5
Prayers sent.
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Post by Gypo on Sept 27, 2023 21:17:56 GMT -5
My thoughts are with you. Post your challenges anytime, lots of folks are here for you.
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Post by Scott W on Oct 1, 2023 8:08:29 GMT -5
Prayers and best wishes Herb.
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Post by Plainsman on Oct 1, 2023 9:25:59 GMT -5
Apologies, Herb, for being late to the thread. Sweet smoke up in the cause. This is beatable. Go team!
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Post by toshtego on Oct 1, 2023 12:51:27 GMT -5
I am sad to read the news, Herb. Prayers offered up to the higher powers. You and the missus are in my thoughts. Stay strong and be there for her as I know you will.
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Post by trailboss on Oct 1, 2023 16:55:49 GMT -5
I agree with Ron, not much you can do if they cannot make the decision to quit. The comparison between pipes and cigs is a tough one, people put the same comparison between tobacco’s and lung ingestion on the same plane… apples and oranges, but trying to convince someone is a tough sell when they dig their heels in.
Nonetheless, prayers for you and your wife Herb.
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Post by oldcajun123 on Oct 2, 2023 15:57:57 GMT -5
 I hope my friends you don’t judge me when prayers are asked, I cannot pray, but I am touched by the asking, I go to bed thinking of the person in need.
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Post by urbino on Oct 2, 2023 18:54:51 GMT -5
I hope my friends you don’t judge me when prayers are asked, I cannot pray, but I am touched by the asking, I go to bed thinking of the person in need. I don't think there's any need for an apology, Brad. For those of us who've had bad experiences with religion or just aren't religious or aren't praying men for whatever reason, our good thoughts are the equivalent. It's all "sweet smoke", as Bob puts it. |
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Post by Plainsman on Oct 2, 2023 19:20:09 GMT -5
I think “prayer” is relative, and not bound to formal religion. Watching a sunset with quiet, grateful admiration is a form of prayer. A thought on behalf of an afflicted friend is definitely a prayer IMO.
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Post by Goldbrick on Oct 2, 2023 19:47:15 GMT -5
Very well put, Bob...when I say prayer, I mean the collective power of well-wishers. I'm not bound to any form of religion myself, but when you say prayer, people know what is needed, no matter the form.
Brad, thanks for your thoughts!
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Post by Darin on Oct 3, 2023 7:46:16 GMT -5
Sorry I missed this earlier, Herb. All the best to you and your family. 🙏
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Zach
Pro Member
If you can't send money, send tobacco.
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Post by Zach on Oct 3, 2023 14:59:40 GMT -5
Herb, I do wish for the best outcome and for your strength in this trying time. I’ve dealt with this quite a bit myself the past decade (cancer in the family) and continue to do so. Try to get out of the house and stay active and proactive while your wife is doing the same. If you feel anxious or mopey alone around the house, try some cafes, library, book stores, or some fall walks in the park. Idle hands can make things a bit harder, and idle minds.
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Post by toshtego on Oct 3, 2023 15:50:53 GMT -5
I think “prayer” is relative, and not bound to formal religion. Watching a sunset with quiet, grateful admiration is a form of prayer. A thought on behalf of an afflicted friend is definitely a prayer IMO. That is how I see prayer. Mostly a meditation and perhaps an expression of thanks to the powers around us. What that might be is up to the individual. |
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Post by Plainsman on Oct 3, 2023 17:41:07 GMT -5
We all relate to the Great Mystery in our own way.
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Post by urbino on Oct 3, 2023 18:31:19 GMT -5
Herb, I do wish for the best outcome and for your strength in this trying time. I’ve dealt with this quite a bit myself the past decade (cancer in the family) and continue to do so. Try to get out of the house and stay active and proactive while your wife is doing the same. If you feel anxious or mopey alone around the house, try some cafes, library, book stores, or some fall walks in the park. Idle hands can make things a bit harder, and idle minds. Yep. Sometimes it's easy to get lost inside your own head. Just going out for a walk reminds your brain that the rest of your body is still there, and the whole big world. It can be a tremendous help. |
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Post by Goldbrick on Oct 3, 2023 18:57:09 GMT -5
Thank you all so very much for your kind words. I have been more active lately, partly to keep my mind busy, and partly to get in the swing of running this place by myself. Until now Sharon and I have split the yardwork, and inside I cook most of our meals, but the washing and cleaning was her department, with some exceptions.
Today we spoke of her downtime a bit, and how we plan to get ahead of it, and just deal with what comes.
This is a chapter in the book of our life that we just have to read page by page.
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Post by Goldbrick on Oct 11, 2023 14:43:22 GMT -5
On the 27th of this month My wife will be having surgery to remove the mass in her left{ not right as first posted } lung. At that time they'll rush it to the lab, and if they find it to be cancer, as think it is, they'll remove the upper portion of the lung and some surrounding tissue.
As of this morning, no more ciggs, only patches, and hard candy.
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Post by Silver on Oct 11, 2023 14:59:12 GMT -5
Good to hear a plan's been established for treatment. Prayers continue.
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I hope my friends you don’t judge me when prayers are asked, I cannot pray, but I am touched by the asking, I go to bed thinking of the person in need. 
